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Saturday 1 August 2009

Friendship

I've been neglecting my friends lately.

I post often on twitter and Tweetdeck posts my tweets automatically to my facebook account. I'd posted about our visit to Southampton General this week so that Matt could have a cardiac MRI and Mel left a comment that pointedly started with "Hello Stranger!"

I sat and thought about it wondering what her problem was and then realised it's probably been about a month since I saw her last. Longer than that for anyone else except the knitting and spinning groups.

I used to hate sitting at home on my own and wondered how some people could do it. I started to tell myself it was because the weather has been so lousy, but yesterday the sun appeared and I raced outside in my bikini and sat spinning and knitting in the garden........it never occurred to me to go and visit someone!

I've been sat wondering why. Am I consciously avoiding the few friends that I've got? No.

To be perfectly honest, I'm just enjoying my own company at the moment.

Life feels so....................samey!

You phone people on a weekly basis and say "Hey, how's it going? What you been up to? What's the gossip? How are you? How are the kids/boyfriend/husband/parents/siblings/cousins/nieces/nephews/theguyyoumetatthepapershop..........."

Truth is; nothing much changes with me. I have pretty much the same routine from day to day and week to week and I started to notice after a while that everyone else does too. The only thing that changes is whatever we want to bitch about and that doesn't change often enough that I want to listen to the same complaints over and over again.

I've done that for people and got sweet FA in return. People that have told me their deepest darkest secrets, come to me and cried on my shoulder and told me their fears. But then those same people move on with their lives, find new people to spend their time with and forget that I'm still here being the faithful friend.

I get so fed up with that and so I've chosen to just not bother with it all for now. I know this means I miss out on other stuff, those friends from the paragraph before move home, find new partners, get married, catch swine flu & recover, have kids...big momentous occasions and I don't get to hear about it unless they happen to post it to facebook and haven't yet removed me as a friend!

Oh well!

I'm not consciously avoiding anyone, I just honestly don't have anything to say! I would hope that my friends, my TRUE friends, would still contact me if they needed me. After all, I haven't moved house, found a partner, got married, caught swine flu OR had (any more) kids LOL.

But I'm not avoiding you because you've pissed me off. I just don't have anything to chat about and I'm getting fed up with replying "Nothing." Whenever you ask what I've been up to; it reminds me of when I was at school. I know you guys aren't really interested in my crafting, so I'm not going to talk your ears off about it. But other than my knitting/spinning/crochet, being a mum and bathing/walking/feeding Isis.....nothing's happened!

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